Have you ever felt that you’re not doing anything worthy with your life and just wasting it doing the same things, again and again, to ‘stay alive’ instead of living? That feeling of unworthiness and dissatisfaction in Life, when we feel that we’re at the bottom of everything! What have you done about it?
I bet, Nothing!
We, who always feel unworthy of anything be saying things like:
- This is not for me
- I can’t do it
- It’s way out of my league
- I’m not strong enough to do it
- I don’t have enough money/resources
and many more. Who decides these thoughts? None other than your biggest and worst enemy: You
You won’t believe that more than 80% of people around the world never reach their goal because of fear of being mocked at if they commit a mistake. They stay the way they are thinking they’re living their best life. But is it?
Understand Yourself and Your Decisions to Know what You Want
Half of the times in your life when we face a difficult decision, we make a decision of not making a decision until it reaches a point where life forces us to take a stand. At that time, we don’t have enough time to think about right and wrong, and the decision we take without thinking often takes us to the wrong path.
In my opinion, or basically what I’ve learned to do is when I have to make a decision, I do the following:
- If the result of this decision is not going to matter after 5 days:
Don’t overthink and kill yourself over it. Just choose which is going to affect negatively in the least possible way. If you are still thinking about it, then choose what comes to mind first. You’ll get over it in 5 days, and will be stronger and wouldn’t have burned your sleep and energy on it.
- If the result of this decision is going to matter until 1 or 2 years:
Don’t take more than 24 hours to make a decision. This decision may change you towards good or bad but not for long. This decision needs some time to think and analyse. Still, this decision won’t make you or break you.. just two years.
- If the result from this decision is going to matter after 2 years
Talk to people, friends, family, strangers, directly or indirectly. Listen to opinions and suggestions and then ‘take the decision yourself’ without getting influenced by these people. I recommend, make this decision after24 hours of talking to someone. You’ll have time to think about negative aspects of this decision as well. Don’t make these decision just because they sound and feel good.
In order to understand yourself and make your behaviour reflect the person you want to become, you have to learn to take decisions. A decision is like a split in a road of life, you have to take one. If you don’t, you’ll stay there in the middle of the road waiting for someone to run you over.
Lack of Vision is the Reason
When I say vision, I mean the ultimate goal of Life. Take a look at your inner self. What do you want to do actually? Talk about the Big Picture. Vision must be clearly defined. Why?
Let’s take an example:
Vision: Travel the World
Not too defined or explained why to travel to the world and what to do. You can just pack the bag, enter the country and leave. You have achieved the Vision, or have you?
Vision: Travel the world and experience the culture, food, festivals, and people first hand
This seems a little clear as to why you need to travel. This time you cannot just enter the country and leave. You have to eat their food, live in their culture, talk to people, and celebrate first. Now ask yourself, have you achieved the vision.
Sometimes you might thin:
“My vision is to ‘Travel the World’ and i know what to do there, after i visit.”
My answer to that is No, you don’t. If you can’t clearly define what you want to do, if you can’t put your vision clearly in words, then you don’t know what you want to do. It’s simple as that. If somebody asks me what is my vision/goal, I can write an entire book about
- what it is
- why this exactly
- when did it come up and how
- what am I doing about it
- what have I done earlier for it
- what I’m going to do in future
- what will happen once I achieve it
But that’s probably not a good idea. You must not share your goals with someone. You can read more about why shouldn’t you share your next step or goal with someone, no matter how close they are to you.
If you know the ultimate goal of life, what you’re supposed to do or what you exactly want to do, consider yourself lucky. Majority of people leave this world without finding their reason or ultimate goal, and how they leave is they tried to ‘stay alive’ as long as possible instead of living this life.
Do you want to find the reason for your life?
One of the best things you can to achieve that is to pick up a bag and leave for a solo trip to the mountains. I can’t stress it enough what it has done for me. I came back as a separate person. The differences I found in me after a week of this first trip:
- I don’t get stressed about anything anymore.
- I realized we’re just a tiny dot in the vast universe, so our problems so matter
- I realized that in the pursuit of success, we forget to live
- I realized friends and family are more important than your girlfriend and boyfriend
- I realized inner peace is much more beautiful than outer anger
- This one seriously. I literally don’t get angry anymore and I always have a smile on the face even is most difficult times
- I understood the power of awareness in your inner self
Why are we not worthy?
Sometimes, I feel amazing when people say to me I can’t do it. This makes me remember a quote I read somewhere:
Just because you can’t do it doesn’t mean i can’t.
When I was talking on the phone to one of my best friends whom I admired dearly because I thought he’s much smarter than me, that I want to be a blogger and writer. He asked mockingly: “What will you write about?”
I was nervous as I didn’t know how and where to start. I told him I want to write about Life and it’s blessings and everything I know about it.
His reaction was basically ROFL & LMFAO. I’m not lying when I say ‘A tear fell down my eyes’ and I disconnected the call.
I got demotivated but instantly I thought ‘No’, this is not what I need. I thought listening to some motivational speech will help. I searched and the first video popped up ‘Les Brown’. The one-sentence he said, literally changed my life.
We say we’re not worthy, we’re not good enough. but for what?
We don’t even know what our ‘innate skill’ is? We don’t have the right to judge ourselves if we don’t know what our goal is. But nature and life will judge you and it’s going to throw you here and there if you don’t even try to find out what you’re supposed to do.
Find out your skill. Everyone has it. Use it to your advantage, make it your passion, make it your habit, make it like the air you breath, make it a part of yourself. MAKE IT YOU.
I’m not a Life Coach or anything but I’ve been through a lot in my life. Being an introvert actually made it worse than it could’ve been. I know there are people like me struggling with life and I want to let them know, You’re not alone. You will rise. You will grow.
Make your passion your livelihood and you’ll never have to work again.
- Overthinking kills you, your passion, your creativity. It creates fear of the things which don’t even matter in your life. Sometimes about the things which don’t exist in your lives. Take control of your mind and learn to control it.
- You are your biggest enemy. Others don’t have power over you.
- If you want to know what you want to do in life, first learn Who You Are?
- If you don’t know your goals, you’ll stay depressed, unfulfilled and always feeling unworthy
- People at this stage tend to favour sleep citing the reason ‘They’re tired from work’. Nope! They want to sleep because literally they don’t have anything else to do and lack motivation even to pick up a fallen piece of paper from the ground.
- Judging yourself is not a solution to your problems. In fact, it adds to the problem. When you feel like you’re judging yourself, immediately clear your thoughts for just 1 minute don’t think of anything else.
- When someone says “You can’t do it.” Reply with ‘Okay’ with a smile on your fact. They just showed you their weakness ‘Their Limit on what THEY can do’. Now you have the chance to ‘not prove to them’ but ‘overpower them’.
Takeaways are the things which I do personally in those circumstances. You are obviously free to do the same.
Do tell us in comments what you do when you feel like giving up on something you wanted or feel low.